Lessons Learned: Warn Your Mamma to Cover Her Ears

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Once again, I was visiting my parents for Labor Day and we decided to go out and have some fun. And by “have some fun,” I mean play miniature golf and eat at a restaurant. Woo. So, it was me and my family – 8 of us total. We played miniature golf and had lots of fun sucking it up and holding everyone else up because there were so many of us. Then my sister gets a wild hair up her butt and decides she wants to do the Skycoaster. Now, for everyone who doesn’t know what I’m talking about, it’s a giant swing where you are lying flat facing the ground in a harness. They take you up in the air 100 feet and then you get to pull the rip cord that drops you. Then, hopefully, the swing catches you before you hit the ground and you swing back and forth…really, really high and really, really fast.

Of course, I jump in and say I’m down for anything. Out of the 8 of us (4 girls and 4 boys), it was the three girls who had enough balls to do the Skycoaster. My mom was the fourth girl and she doesn’t ride kiddie rides, but all of the “MEN” backed out. Anyway, they suit the three of us up and then we had to decide who was going to pull the rip cord. You have probably guessed it by now, it was me who got elected/had enough balls to do it.

They take us up and I pull the rip cord. We were so freakin’ high. I have never been that scared in my life. So as we free fall to the concrete below I let out a huge scream that went a little bit like this: “Oh, SH**!” Even though I was flying through the air, I could still see the look on my mother’s face. It was a look of pure shock – the kind of shock you might see if someone pooped on the President. This is the same woman who was furious about something and said “that stinks.” Hey, I wasn’t the only one screaming expletives – my sister was also screaming out SOB! (Among other things)

Lesson Learned: Tell your mother to put on her ear muffs before you go on the Skycoaster if she isn’t used to “bad words.”