AFC Classic- Cinematic Sedatives: Which Films Fail to Keep YOU in Action?

Posted on June 18, 2014 by Action Flick Chick

Friends assure me I’ve watched the movie Elektra – tried to watch it anyway. Apparently I turned it on and the thing put me to sleep. Twice.

Which movie is most memorable for having put you to sleep? The power of ZZZZZ….

Answers on Facebook:
Autograph Hound: Believe it or not, The Godfather. And I love James Caan.
Branden Drew: Robin Hood( the Russel Crow one ).
Bree King: Transformers. Every time I’ve tried to watch, I’ve fallen asleep.
Chris Cardwell: I used to always fall asleep halfway through Forrest Gump. It’s a great movie, but I’d still fall asleep.
Frank C. IV: Metro w/ Eddie Murphy. went to see it in HS with a buddy and either I was really tired or really bored cuz I was out
Gābrielle R Betz: Matchstick Men!
James Long ‎2001: A Space Odyssey
Jared Moraitis: Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever. Ugh.
Jason Biggerstaff: The Phantom Menace
Jeff Miller: Blackhawk Down. tried watching it 4 times, and fell asleep 4 times.
Jennifer Lawrence Wurzer: The Abyss. I know, I know….
John Dallaire: Second on Transformers. Also, Avatar.
Josh Stewart: I passed out on Queen of the Damned in the fucking theater. That movie could put anyone into one hell of a sound slumber.
Kanu Digit: Fellowship of the Ring was sleep inducing. 15 minutes of canoe riding? Like they said in Clerks 2 you have 3 movies that are about people walking.
Ma Ngina: Lord of the Ringzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Melissa Renee Renninger: The Mexican
Michael Gonzalez: Dune
Mike Sullivan: The English patient.
Nick Leshi: Supergirl
Rafa Alejandro: George a. romero’s diary of the dead!
Ricky Barrera: Moulin Rouge !!
Rikki Reed: ‎9th gate
Scott Larson: Master & Commander- it was so slooooooow…

Answers on twitter:
biffmon: Last Mad Standing with Bruce Willis – first time I ever fell asleep in a movie theatre. #yawn #insanebulletcount
CandiedWalnuts: darkness w/ anna paquin. I don’t think anything actually happened in that movie…
Channel23hahaha: Godzilla remake, Robin Hood with Russell Crowe, and thats it. for now. If i think of more, i’ll share.
Dalanna23: Godzilla, 1998. Fell asleep on a date in the theatre.
DAREALGUMMY: Elektra. I seriously don’t remember a single thing about that movie. Oh and from my childhood, “Sneakers”
elizabeth_ann: if its something i’ve never seen, i’ll turn off before it puts me to sleep. if it’s a fav… i’ll fall asleep and then re-watch
ElmntsofMadness: Know a guy that fell asleep in the theater during the beginning sequence of “Gladiator.” I’ve only done it to movies I’ve seen.
EnnisDL: ‘Akira’, runner-up ‘Star Trek: The Motion Picture’ RT
entityflux: “Armageddon”. Popped it in (rental) & fell asleep shortly thereafter. I yawn every time it comes on. I’ve never seen it.
erinpayne99: I had a really hard time staying awake for The Avengers (1998) Obviously hopes are much higher for upcoming film of same name!
fredventurini: Vanilla Sky, English Patient in a tie. English Patient couldn’t keep me awake and I’ve actually been on fire.
homestar278: The newer Alice in Wonderland
ItsGregWilcox: Barry Lyndon. GREAT movie, but you need to be in the right mood (and have a pot of coffee handy).
jackdteague: Yellow Submarine, put me right out.
jade_kadir: “Russian Ark” got the closest to making me fall asleep. I had to Clockwork Orange my eyes to finish it.
JakePick: Shutter Island.
Jdinfinite: Matrix 2. And this was on an IMax.
JediiRaccoon: Powder..granted I was pretty tired..fell asleep halfway into it, woke up in the theater at the end…& my friends didn’t notice
jeffncarrie4234: Titanic..my wife made me go, long and boring.
johnny_williams: The Beach (imdb.com/title/tt016397…) put me to sleep. Wish I had slept on K19 the Widowmaker (imdb.com/title/tt026762…) as well.
Joseph3B: Silent Hill
kesseljunkie: Matrix Revolutions. First action film I ever fell asleep during. I did not replay the parts I missed.
LeighLiving: “Last Night”… granted I was a little bit tipsy but still … Zzzz.
Luigi2197: I’ve never been able to finish Piraña 3D. Even after 4 attempts the Zzzz win.
MakeMerich1976: the first lord of the rings…saw it in theaters fell asleep about 20 mins into it…same thing at home when i rented it
mia_1980: March of the Penguins – Morgan Freeman’s voice is hypnotic. Also Jurassic Park – qued for hours! Woke up when T-Rex roared.
MomItForward: Probably Valkyrie with Tom Cruise. ^B
monsterpopcorn: I’m sure many people will gawk at me for this, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. I’ve tried 3 times but fell asleep each time.
mpnye: Dances With Wolves. I’ve tried watching it because of the Oscars … and fallen asleep every single time. I’ve given up.
Mr_Wiedman: lord of the rings and the princess frog #zzzzzzzz
NighthawkTorres: The Interpreter, it’s the only movie I have fallen asleep in. It’s crappiness is one of the few things my dad and I agree on.
pedrosttau: I would say “The Tree of Life”. Not saying its a bad movie though.
PeterDiCicco: Star Trek The Motion Picture. Look, the Enterprise is flying into a cloud. Zzzz… Oh, still flying through the cloud. Zzzz…
rage_A: Ecks vs sever. Actually dozed off in the theatre
RealKareemAli: so many can’t recall all but definitely the Hulk (not Ed Norton one). It was boring, dumb and I still haven’t seen all of it
Rliyen: Godzilla 2000… And I LOVE Godzilla.
RMartian: Technically at the end of Return there’d be no more Sith at all. I’ll add that to the reasons I’m no longer a Star Wars fan.
Rob_Uprichard: Star Wars Episode 4 – A New Hope when I was 4. Lol
roblightbody: robocop 2. Slept like a baby in the cinema.
Ryeguy695: The first Hulk movie with Eric Bana.
s4m4nth4x: Sideways. Never finished it, turned it off because I kept falling asleep.
scottandrewh: Up the Academy, Himatsuri, The Wizard of Mars…
Shaggy_MN_1975: The Shining put me to sleep, not nearly as intense near the end as the book was
scubadiverjames: revolutionary road had me asleep within 10 minutes.
Superherologist: I never feel asleep in a movie theater, but half the people I saw Fantastic Four 2 with (including a comic book writer) did.
parisianfeline: Superherologist hahaha!
Syd_Lexia: Final Fantasy: Spirits Within.
ThatSpiderDude: it’s all cos play politics #cosplotics
ThePotatoPope: Swordfish, I always wake up fro the giant explosion but then fall right back asleep.
v_for_vienetta: Nixon is my “I can’t sleep” movie.
VeeSinner: Judge Dredd. Saw it in theater w/ friend n family. Friend & I fell asleep through the middle. “I am the law!”
whysospurious: I’ve tried 3 times to watch original Italian Job, always doze off. I like it but never stay awake. Most boring? Death Proof.

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No Pulse, No Problem: Quirky Zombie Movies

Posted on June 11, 2014 by Alex

Warm Bodies is a zombie/young adult/romance, which doesn’t seem like a genre blend that should work, but somehow it does. It’s not the first flick to blend genres in non-traditional ways, however. Sure, Shaun of the Dead is probably the most well-known zombified genre smash, blending the undead with a romantic comedy, but there are several lesser-known films which utilize the walking dead to tell stories that are a bit more unexpected.

Fido

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If you’ve ever played any of the Fallout games, Fido‘s aesthetic and setting will be immediately familiar to you: 1950’s Americana. In a world recovering from a near-zombie apocalypse, people now sell zombies as housepets/servants. The Robinson family buys one such deadhead, and their boy Timmy immediately takes a shining to the creature and names him Fido. What follows is a blend of horror and comedy, told through the story formula of a children’s movie. Kid finds life-changing supernatural thing, which is typically a robot or an alien, but, in this case, it’s a zombie. Kid befriends it and the two beings bond. Eventually, the thing becomes a lot of trouble. Boy and thing are almost separated, but, in the end, their bond endures. Fido is strangely feel-good despite of the numerous character casualties and macabre tone.

Wasting Away (Aah! Zombies)

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While the undead are a pretty common enemy in media these days, it’s not often that we get to see life (or un-life, as it were) from their perspective. In Wasting Away, the zombies are the heroes… and they don’t know they’re zombies. The infected characters see non-zombies as sped-up, and can’t understand why they react to them with such horror. There’s a blend of sharp writing and clever trope-twisting at work here, all wrapped up with some smart cinematic techniques, such as the zombies’ perspective being in color, but the humans’ perspective in black and white reminiscent of Night of the Living Dead.

 

Dead Alive (Braindead)

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Watching this film, it’s hard to believe that it was directed by the same filmmaker who has helmed the cinematic versions of Tolkiens’ Lord of the Rings trilogy and The Hobbit. Dead Alive is a slapstick horror that would fit right at home on the resume of Sam Raimi. Even the non-horror scenes maintain this level of peculiarity to them, which helps keep these comparatively mundane scenes memorable. Be forewarned, however: most of Dead Alive is disgusting. Few flicks can match the sheer grotesque carnage to be found in this Kiwi zom-com. People get the skin peeled from their faces, zombies get diced up by lawnmowers, and there’s a Three Stooges-esque comedy of errors in a funeral home that has to be seen to be believed. It’s wild, it’s creative, and it’s certainly never dull, but Dead Alive is one movie not to be watched on a full stomach.

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10 Things X-Men: Days of Future Past Does Right

Posted on June 6, 2014 by Action Flick Chick

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Not only does Charles Xavier get his hope back, but fans do as well for the future of X-Men movies thanks to X-Men: Days of Future Past. It’s easily my favorite movie of the summer thus far thanks to the return of director Bryan Singer, who directed X-Men and X2. In the latest x-outing, Wolverine goes back in time to find a very young and lost Charles Xavier, hoping to work with him to fix the effed-up future left behind by the equally effed-up X-Men: The Last Stand. Days of Future Past is based on a classic X-Men storyline of the same name, one that’s both beloved and, if mishandled, ripe for continuity errors and general terribleness. Fortunately, Days of Future Past handles itself with dignity and intelligence, sending a blue shell to destroy any worries we had that they’d screw this up. Here are but a few of the many ways this film does things right. (Vague, could-possibly-be-spoilery spoilers ahead!)

  1. Their treatment of time travel makes sense. In so many films time travel is performed in a way that stretches the imagination beyond feasible, but this is, after all, a world where people get genetically-induced superpowers, so it allowed the writers to create a feasible method of time travel, and, with a bit of thought behind it, mechanics that make sense. It’s not Wolverine physically traveling in time, it’s his consciousness being sent back into his own past psyche, so no worries about the same matter occupying the same space a la Timecop or any such nonsense.
  2. Despite the cast being huge, the core story focuses on a few key individuals. This keeps the film from becoming overloaded with too many story lines going in different directions, tiring and frustrating the audience while cheating the characters of proper screen time and purpose (cough, The Amazing Spider-man 2, cough). Mystique, Charles, and Erik are the main drivers of the story, occasionally pulling over to let someone else drive for a minute while they rest in the passenger seat. Yeah, that’s right, Wolverine’s a key player in this, but it’s definitely not his story.
  3. The casting. Now this started a long time ago, but Jesus! They’ve accumulated a cast so talented it almost makes your head explode!
  4. Quicksilver. The addition of the always-awesome Evan Peters as Quicksilver is a small detail, but he brought such an unfettered sense of fun to the film that it helped keep things from going all DC Comics and getting way too broody.DF-24122 Jennifer Lawrence on the set of X-Men: Days of Future Past.
  5. The strong story focus (and lack of sexual focus) on Mystique. Jennifer Lawrence is Hollywood’s golden girl at the moment, and part of that is because she’s a damn fine actress— a fact put to good use by Bryan Singer by making sure she has a meaty part, not to exploit her meaty parts.
  6. The Sentinels are probably the most terrifyingly powerful foes ever put to film. They can shapeshift, copy mutant powers, and are so scary I should probably stop talking about them lest they find me.
  7. Great attention to small details. Days of Future Past is jam-packed with fun little nods to fans of the franchise, like Wolverine’s annoyance (and subsequent amusement) when he thinks he’s going to set off a metal detector, or Quicksilver mentioning that his mom dated a guy who could bend metal, and, for the comics fans, that enigmatic after-credits scene.
  8. x-men-days-of-future-past-DF-04508_rgbIt was the perfect send off for the stars of the original x-trilogy.
  9. The ending is so satisfying, I don’t have to eat for a year. I’m okay with an unambiguously happy ending. We freaking deserve this— we’ve been watching these x-movies for almost fifteen years now, and it’s okay to see a happy ending for the original cast.
  10. It wraps everything up nicely, but still leaves some room to wonder what’s going to happen later (or, more accurately, what already happened). Sure, we know that the future ends up with everything okay for our X-heroes, but we’ve got a good forty-year-gap between ’73 and now for lots of adventures to take place.

This is the Action Flick Chick, and you’ve just been kicked in the ass!

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Dawn of the Planet of the Apes’ New Poster Is Awesome

Posted on June 5, 2014 by Action Flick Chick

War is brewing in Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, and things are going to get messy. Genetically evolved apes vs. humans- can either side be reasoned with? Are the apes going to kick our asses? Will poo be flung everywhere? The newest poster for this 2oth Century Fox film looks amazing, and has me interested in the film without even having watched a single trailer.

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As you can see, the film rides into theaters July 11, 2014, and stars Andy Serkis, Jason Clarke, Gary Oldman, Keri Russell, Toby Kebbell, Kodi Smith-McPhee, Enrique Murciano, and Kirk Acevedo.

This is the Action Flick Chick and you’ve just been kicked in the ass!

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Review: Halt and Catch Fire Pilot

Posted on June 2, 2014 by Action Flick Chick

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AMC’s original show, Halt and Catch Fire, has finally premiered! To learn more about whether or not it’s worth a watch, check out my review over at Crave Online. Spoiler alert: hell yeah it is, and I’ve already added to my DVR.

AMC has become a force to be reckoned with by creating original, and above all else, fantastic programming. SXSW gave audiences a sneak peek at AMC’s newest project, “Halt and Catch Fire,” which looks like it will also join the growing list of critically-acclaimed/unanimously popular AMC shows. Read more…

This is the Action Flick Chick, and you’ve just been kicked in the ass!

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Blood on the Canvas: Karate Girl

Posted on May 29, 2014 by Action Flick Chick

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I don’t know about you, but watching an awesome, balls-to-the-wall fight gets me pumped up and ready to take on the world. This week’s Blood on the Canvas highlights not one, but two, talented women in Karate Girl. In this Japanese film, Rina Takeda and Haruna Tobimatsu play sisters who’ve been separated after an evil butthole kills their father. Despite being apart for many years, the sisters fight their way back to each other and avenge their father. All in all Karate Girl is a solid film, with a solid, if a bit unimaginative, story and some great fight scenes- including a couple of brawls which stand head and shoulders above the rest. Below you will find a 12 minute supercut of the best fights in Karate Girl, including two separate smackdowns and then the lengthy, spectacularly choreographed finale. Enjoy!

This is the Action Flick Chick, and you’ve just been kicked in the ass!

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Syfy Acquires the Rights to Starz’ Spartacus

Posted on May 26, 2014 by Action Flick Chick

new-spartacus-trailer-released

Syfy has been acquiring several shows to mix in with their original programming, but none quite like Spartacus. This is a Starz original series with 39 episodes, and, just like Starz’ other shows, Spartacus is chock full of nudity, sex, and gory violence. It’s very interesting that Syfy will be playing it on basic cable- I can’t help but wonder how that’s going to work. If they get away with playing this series unedited I will be shocked… and very pleased.  I for one, hope they are able to air it full of the butts, boobs, and violence it was intended to have so I can get caught up on my favorite titillating swords and sandals show. It is what it is, and I like it. Spartacus will air on Syfy Thursday, June 26 at 10pm (ET/PT).

Here’s a run down of the show from the press release:

Spartacus was inspired by the actual slave of the Roman Republic who, in 73 BC, led a slave revolt that grew to more than 120,000 fighters. Defying the Roman Republic’s legions of soldiers, they campaigned for two years through much of what is now Italy before succumbing to a much larger army. The new series told a new set of stories rich in character, action, sex and combat centered on the title character. As punishment for defying a Roman Legate, Spartacus was sentenced to die in the gladiator arena. But after surviving numerous fights, his sentence was commuted and sold as a slave to be trained as a gladiator.Spartacus was executive produced by Rob Tapert (The Grudge, Xena: Warrior Princess and Hercules: The Legendary Journeys), Steven S. DeKnight (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), Sam Raimi (Spider-Man and The Evil Dead), and Joshua Donen (The Quick and the Dead).  The lead and title character was originally played by the beloved late Andy Whitfield. Following Whitfield’s departure from the series in 2010, Liam McIntyre was recast as the title character.

Additional cast members included: Lucy Lawless (Xenia: Warrior Princess) as Lucretia, who along with her husband Batiatus (John Hannah), owned the slave Spartacus and the original gladiator camp; Erin Cummings (Dollhouse) as Sura, Spartacus’ wife; Peter Mensah (300, Avatar) as Doctore;  Manu Bennett (30 Days of Night, The Condemned) as Crixus; Craig Parker (The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Legend of the Seeker) as Glaber, Ilithyia (Accidents Happen), played by Viva Bianca; Nick E. Tarabay (Crash, The Sopranos) as Ashur,  Dustin Clare (Underbelly, Satisfaction) as Gannicus;  and Todd Lasance as Gaius Julius Caesar.

This is the Action Flick Chick, and you’ve just been kicked in the ass!

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The Expendables 3 Arrive in Style at Cannes Film Festival!

Posted on May 22, 2014 by Action Flick Chick

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The cast of The Expendables 3 arrived at the Cannes Film Festival in style…and for these action movie-infused men, “in style” means arriving on tanks. Whether you love The Expendables or not, these guys always look like they’re having fun when they’re together! The newest entry into the action mega-franchise explodes into theaters August 15, 2014 with an even bigger cast of superstars. Until then, I’ll take anything I can get that’s Expendables related, so here are some pictures from the Cannes Film Festival.

This is the Action Flick Chick, and you’ve just been kicked in the ass!

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