The Expendables is an action movie lover’s dream come true! I love it! I want to marry it and have little expendable babies!
The film is about six extremely talented mercenaries-for-hire, who do things like rescue hostages or do any kind of insane dirty work. They get hired to go into the island of Vilena, they go in, and the wreck stuff. Awesome! This film brings together almost every single action legend, new and old school, into one film for a testosterone filled blood bath. Granted, the plot and the acting certainly are not award winning, but the action is!
What a beautiful picture!
The action in The Expendables is astounding! It was brutal, creative, hard core, and even stays crunchy in milk! This film was meant to be an action orgy and it delivered. However, even this film, a film filled to the brim with all these action stars, was not non-stop action. There was way more down time than I expected, but it still had plenty and the quality of the action more than makes up for the parts that are lacking.
I read one review that said The Expendables had a “lack of imagination.” Excuse me! It takes a LOT of imagination to come up with that many different kinds of explosions and that many different ways to kill the baddies! I have seen a lot of action movies and there were some kill techniques I had never seen in another film. As far as plot goes, there might not have been much branching out to create something new there, but who watches an action movie for its plot? That’s just silly!
Go now and give your money to support The Expendables! Action lovers will love it!
Beware! Spoilers Below!
Time Until Action: ~ 4 minutes
Best Kill by each Expendable:
Hale Caesar (Terry Crews): Picture this: You hear insanely loud gun shots, louder than anything you’ve ever heard. What is that? You look down a hallway and see baddies getting blown to pieces as they’re trying to run away. Then you see Caesar walk into view with a massive machine gun annihilating every baddie in his path!!!!
Toll Road (Randy Couture): Wrestler vs. Westler! Road caught up to Paine (Steve Austin) in the end and the two went at it showing off their wrestling skills. After body slamming each other for awhile, Road pushes Paine into a flaming river of gasoline. Paine goes up in flames and then Road delivers one final blow by jumping in the air and punching a flaming Paine in the face.
Yin Yang (Jet Li): Big baddie’s second hand man (Gary Daniels) is getting tag teamed by Yang and Christmas. After taking turns punching and kicking the guy, Christmas holds the guy with his head leaned back while Yang comes down with a savage kick, breaking the dude’s neck and making everyone watching cringe!
Lee Christmas (Jason Statham): Christmas pops his head out of the nose of an airplane while Ross is flying it towards a dock chock full of baddies. Christmas unloads the machine gun onto the baddies while Ross dumps fuel on them. Christmas then shoots a flare and sets off a huge explosion all along the dock killing just about every single baddie!
Barney Ross (Sylvester Stallone): Baddies are messing with the girl all these guys came to rescue (Gisele Itie). Big mistake, fellas! Ross didn’t care for their un-gentlemanly conduct, and he teaches them some manners by cutting clean through one guys hand right before he spins around and completely decapitates the other guy. He finishes the first guy by stabbing him in the throat and twisting the knife like a doorknob all around.
Action Rating: 5 Action-Palooza, out of 5.
Illustration by Alex Langley. Rocket Llama World Headquarters.
This is the Action Flick Chick, and you’ve just been kicked in the ass!
“who watches an action movie for its plot?”
Agreed. Action movies are like porn with more action and people keep their clothes on…most of the time.
shortened url = http://3.ly/EXPS
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I was not impressed. A lot of the action felt staged, granted it WAS, but it shouldn’t look like that. It was like people were positioning themselves just right to be tossed about like rag dolls. It was like, play fighting with your friends when you were 8, the only thing missing was the “dooosh, dooosh” noises as you swung your fists.
I wanted a lot more out of this one, yes, explosions were great, but the choreography of the fight scenes looked like crap for the most part. Still, it didn’t suck, but if you have one film to see, it surprises me that so many are flocking to this one . . .
What saved it for me was of course that fuckin’ shotgun!!!!! It was almost worth the price of admission.
I really liked this movie. I admit I had low expectations going in, because that many egos in one room usually spells trouble. In spite of this movie being a sausage fest I enjoyed the hell out of ‘Expendables’. It made me feel like a kid again in the 80’s when action movies were politically incorrect, testosterone drenched, bone crunching, bullet riddled, might makes right, r-rated fun fests with steroid abusing actors that were big on muscle, low on intelligence.
Rick I love you but I was impressed! Staged or not, and yes of course they had to be – this film was one action blow after the other.
I have to say, Lee Christmas was my FAV. I so envy Charisma Carpenter for being able to kiss this hottie. Now that I got that bit of girlie stuff out of the way. Christmas has the right mix of bad-ass plus gentleman, and super action guy that made me go HELL YES!
The explosions were epic. Every character was cool and bad in his own right. Micky Rourke was fantastic, but you have to love the cameos by ARNOLD and BRUCE!
Okay, I will stop rambling on and drooling. I love the film for exactly what it is, no more, no less. ACTION, ACTION and more ACTION!
Can you give me a HELL YES 🙂
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