It’s that time of year again! A time when everyone is in the holiday spirit and full of love and willing to give to the less fortunate…but mostly give to the people that they really like or need to suck up too. I love this time of the year, and not because I get to give my “loved ones” gifts. Oh no! It’s because I want gifts! So have you sent yours to me yet?
Anyway, Christmas is a magical time for most kids (and me) and what better way to get into that Christmas spirit than by watching a guy who has the ability to make you believe in anything. Ernest P. Worrell (Jim Varney) has such enthusiasm about life that he could tell me that Bigfoot and the Tooth Fairy are having a sexy rendezvous in the back of a club and I would believe him! That’s why I love the film Ernest Saves Christmas. I mean he really does save Christmas. He really makes you want to believe in Santa Claus with his high energy, high spirits, and child like gusto. Yeah! I’m cleaning the chimney and putting cookies in the oven right now!
Ernest Saves Christmas is a great holiday movie. It’s lighthearted, silly, and amusing. It even has some action in it! Ernest is always full of sound advice too. Here are some things you can learn from Ernest in this film alone:
- The words to “O Christmas Tree” actually go like this: O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree, o Christmas tree, o Christmas tree! Thanks to Ernest P. Worrell I neither now nor will I ever know the right words to this song! Ernest isn’t just about teaching us the wrong words to songs, though.
- According to Ernest, “Even in emergency situations, always follow safety guidelines.” So if you need to back up into oncoming traffic just to pick up a Christmas tree out of the road, remember to always turn on your emergency lights like Ernest did. I bet it will work 100% of the time with no problems. Thanks, Ernest!
- Little ladies are safe with Ernest as evidenced by little girl Harmony (Noelle Parker) jumping in his cab at random and then becoming best friends with him in 5 minutes and then staying at his house that night. That’s not dangerous for someone to do in the slightest.
- You soothe minor burns on the hands by applying gobs and gobs of butter! Actually that’s not true, so don’t try it. It only works in Ernest world. Butter can actually trap heat in and cause infections, but it’s funny to watch Ernest rub butter all over himself.
- “5th graders think they know everything.” I loved the part where Ernest got up in the faces of the kids to mock them. So don’t be fooled by any 5th graders. They may act sweet, but deep down they think they’re better than you.
- In sticky situations, “Nobody moves, nobody dies.” Remember that the next time you come across a T-Rex.
- 2 of Santa’s reindeer are actually called Dunder and Blixem. This is actually no joke. I kept trying to figure out why Ernest was saying Dunder; but according to Wikipedia, those are the original names of the reindeer. They were later changed to Donner and Blitzen. Ernest, you just blew my mindhole! My whole world just got turned upside down!
I haven’t seen Ernest Saves Christmas since I was a child, but now I think I will add it to my “Must watch holiday movies” list.
This is the Action Flick Chick, and you’ve just been kicked in the ass! Merry Christmas!
